Ritual is the passageway of the soul into the Infinite. – Algernon Blackwood
I miss the rituals that filled so much of my youth. I was raised Catholic. I attended 8 years of Catholic school, was an organist and altar girl in my parish, and was the 4th generation of my family married in the building my great great grandfather provided the lumber for. When I went off to college, I began looking for something else, something more profound, and something mine. While I am grateful for the religious foundation my family provided me, it doesn’t suit me as an adult. Over time, I realized one of the things I needed in my life was meaningful rituals, so I set out to create my own.
When the weather cools, my rituals change with the shifting seasons. As the temperature drops, I take to drinking hot tea again. I love the ritual of tea. It’s something I developed with a friend during my first full-time job out of grad school. I love the smell of the leaves, the kettle whistle, and the mug’s warmth in my hands. I keep only mugs I love to use. They have to be large and aesthetically pleasing. No tiny tea cups in my cupboard! I also make extra efforts to ensure the things I use, touch, and experience during my tea ritual are special. I recently created a special tea station in my kitchen, with an electric tea kettle and a special box to hold my tea collection. It adds to my tea experience to open my cupboard, select a mug, open this special box, and select my tea. I love everything I touch when I make a cup of tea.
One of my favorite rituals is my morning meditation. I light a candle, burn some Palo wood (I love the smell), and sit. I watch my thoughts come and go and try not to get caught up in them. The emphasis is on try. Then, when the timer chimes, I say a prayer, extinguish my candle, and start my day. This ritual allows me time to transition from sleep to consciousness and sets a tone and intention for the coming hours.
A daily ritual is a way of saying “I’m voting for myself. I’m taking care of myself.” – Mariel Heminway
I soak in a hot bath during the winter when my body is cold to my marrow. I dress the tub with bubble bath or bath salts and essential oils. I turn down the lights, light an earthy candle, turn on some soothing music, and enjoy a book that feeds my soul. The heat warms my body and soothes my increasingly achy body. The water washes the day from my skin. Finally, I climb into bed feeling warm and fresh from my soak, ready to drift off into deep slumber.
Time in nature fuels me. It washes away my worries, calms my anxieties, and heals my heart, soul, mind, and body. I take time to be in nature by cycling, hiking, cross-country skiing, or just sitting in the park on a blanket or bench and enjoying the surroundings. Each of these journeys into nature is a ritual for me. I am not religious. Nature is my church. I feel closer to God there than in any church building. I sit under the tree canopy, smell the crisp air, feel the crunch of vegetation under my feet, enjoy the sun on my skin, and soak up the sounds around me. Whether on foot, bike, or ski, my exposure to nature is a cathartic ritual involving a cycle of release, rest, renewal, and return to daily life. The ritual is both internal and external. It starts with the preparation for the journey and ends when I return home.
During the pandemic, a dear friend invited me to start a gratitude ritual with her. Each day, we text one thing we are grateful for to each other. Over time, it expanded to also include sharing something we look forward to. This ritual has kept us connected and grounded in gratitude during a very tough time in our lives. Our friendship has grown so much more robust and we are closer as a result.
A friend and I answer the same 5 questions when we meet. We created a shared ritual that brings greater intimacy and a deeper connection to our friendship.
These are all rituals I have developed to bring the sacred into my every day. Each of these is a solemn rite that grounds me, cultivates my gratitude for daily life, connects me to others, and makes the mundane of everyday life sacred. We all need our rituals, be they religiously rooted or otherwise.
I encourage you to find a way to include meaningful rituals in your daily life. They are not just for Sunday mornings.
How to create a tea box
1. Obtain a Moppe wooden storage box from Ikea, a pint of wood stain, and a set of small drawer pulls.
2. Flip the drawers of the box around, so the backs of the drawers are now the fronts.
3. Stain the sides of the box and the fronts of the drawers. I brushed on one coat of stain, let it sit for a minute or two, and then wiped it off with a paper towel. Be sure to wear protective gloves when staining.
4. Drill holes into the front of the drawers and add the hardware.
5. Fill with tea and supplies and enjoy!
References
Macneil, N. (2019). The Rituals. Chronicle Books LLC.
Reshell, A. (2021). The Power of Sacred Rituals. Uplift. https://uplift.love/the-power-of-sacred-rituals/