Class Reunions

Recently I began to wonder why we still hold high school reunions and how this tradition started. I tried to research this and there isn’t much to be found. About an hour’s worth of research uncovered a few opinion pieces where people contemplate if they are going to their high school reunion and why this is still a thing, a history of reunions at Princeton, a lot of class reunion announcements and summaries of the events, and a few pieces about weight loss and improving your looks before attending a class reunion. Vanity is apparently a cousin to the high school reunion. The best I can determine is that class reunions date back at

least 200 years. Beyond that, I don’t have any details as to the origins of this practice.

Today, in the US, this ritual is held approximately every 5 years for most high school classes.  Some small colleges also hold class reunions, but in the US, this event is generally saved to remind us of adolescence past – a tumultuous time that some of us are very happy to leave in the past.

In school, I was the fat, nerdy kid with glasses who had a big vocabulary I wasn’t afraid to use. During my freshman and sophomore years, I read sci-fi books rather than chit chat with my classmates between classes or on the bus. I had zero athletic ability and wasn’t afraid to answer (or ask) questions during class. As you can imagine, this made me really popular with my peers. I was one of those who found their tribe when they went to college. High school wasn’t exactly hell for me but it definitely wasn’t the best 4 years of my life.

When the time came, I decided to attend my 5-year reunion. I hoped to connect with some of my high school friends only to discover the only people who came were those who were still living in the same clique of friends they had in high school. They had all settled close to home after graduation. Some went to college and then settled back in the area after earning their degree. I had nothing in common with them and didn’t feel the need to make small talk (my own personal hell) with people I couldn’t relate to in high school let alone years later. When I found this same scene at the 10-year reunion, I decided this wasn’t for me. I won’t be attending future reunions.

I feel high school reunions try to celebrate who we were, where we came from, and who we are now but fail to hit the mark. When we return to this situation with people we knew in a very limited context, we tend to revert in some ways to who we were in high school I don’t dislike who I was at 16, 17, or 18, but I do really like who I am now. I would rather hang out with who I am now than revisit who I was then. Reunions remind me of school dances with loud music, awkward small talk, and never getting asked to dance during the slow songs. For me, it’s a superficial event that I survive not enjoy. I would much rather connect with a few specific high school friends over drinks or dinner. This provides me with the deeper, more meaningful connection that I crave.

For those who enjoy reunions, more power to you. Have a enjoy remembering that time a bunch of guys from the senior class drove tractors to school during spirit week for “Thank God I’m a Country Boy” day.

I will be there in spirit only.